Have you met a Rock Star?

I have worked with a lot of bands, entertainers, lawyers, doctors, you name it. People find out that I work in stage lighting as a profession and they generally have two questions.
1. Do you get to see a lot of shows for free?
2. Have you met a Rock Star?

The answer to #1 is yes, I see a lot of "shows" for free. Shows about economic reforms in Washington, Plastic Surgery, stock valuations, and lots of music that I end up not liking. The unfavorable outweighs the favorable most times, but that is why it's a job and not a vacation.

The answer to #2 is yes, I've met Vanilla Ice. I've worked with many many bands over the years, some professional, some more challenging to get on with. One of the most professional bands I've had the pleasure of working with is Big Bad Voodoo Daddy, and they put on a very impressive set as well.

My Vanilla Story

This was many years ago, probably around 2002. I was subcontracted by the staging company to provide the lighting package for the Vanilla Ice club show. The venue was Arundel Mills mall at Jillians in a back club room. Jillians went belly up a few years back and is not Dave & Busters for those of you familiar with Arundel Mills Mall.

We get there early to set up some moving lights, some conventional lights and a strobe. Pretty easy load in. Lunch is at the venue which is always nice, so off to lunch we go. In the middle of lunch Mike Scarfe of MHA Audio comes out to us and says "you guys better get in here, they are taking apart the drum riser right now". While we were at lunch the band arrived and got right into it. I get on stage and saw that someone was under the drum riser trying to take it apart with only his legs sticking out. We say that we can handle whatever is needed and Vanilla Ice slides out from the drum riser. I guess he's a take charge kind of guy.

He explains that the drum riser is too big and needs to be moved to the other side of the stage, okay, no problem, we'll take care of it. After the riser is moved Vanilla comes up to me to ask about the control of the strobe light. I explain that I will control it from my console out in the house. He says that his DJ needs to have control of the strobe. I have a small remote for the strobe but the cable is very short. He says we should hook it up with the remote set to full and his DJ will simply use a power strip to turn the strobe on and off with electric. This blew me away because I've never had a musician trouble shot a problem, and his idea was pretty good. Okay, I'm impressed at this point. A musician with a clue about lighting.

Everyone has seen Vanilla Ice on MTV interviews and media and probably thinks he a real ass. NOT the case what so ever. He was great to work with and a good communicator and problem solver, definitely not typical. I went into this job expecting the MTV persona and found out that he's really great to work with.

Now it's time for sound check. WTF - Vanilla Ice is now a hardcore act? Weird, but okay. VI is checking vocals. Then he's on the drum kit, AND he's rocking out. Next over to the bass. WHAT - he knows how to play multiple instruments? At this point I'm really shocked because my expectations from what the media showed me are totally reversed. In summary Vanilla Ice is a pretty cool dude. And that was the time I met Vanilla Ice.

Security Measures

We've all experienced the *new* *enhanced* Security measures in our daily life. Today I was greeted by ING's newest form of enhanced security when I logged on to see if 1099-INT forms were available for download. No tax forms available yet, BUT - please update your 4 digit pin to a 6-10 digit pin. Okay, I'll just repeat my four digit pin. Nope, not allowed. Alright, I'll repeat and change the last two digits, nope not allowed. What then! It's getting as bad as having the company just assign a pin to you! How is the general public supposed to remember their respective pins when everyone keeps changing the rules? Some don't require a capitol letter, some require the capitol letter, some require the capitol letter AND at least one number, but NO characters other than letters and numbers. When will an emoticon be required in the password - NOT at the beginning or end of the password, but somewhere in the middle of the 12-18 string of characters?

Can't Google, Apple, or Visa come up with an industry standard password format AND STICK TO IT? I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one who is frustrated with the ever changing virtual security.

Three days

MONDAY-
The Maryland auditor showed up on time at 9:30. I had all of the documents printed and organized per the audit letter as to speed the process and show compliance. The auditor was friendly and happy to see the documents all ready to review, he asked a few reasonable questions and was on his way. Total time was one hour, 9:30 - 10:30. THAT is why I didn't loose any sleep over this one, nothing to hide, so I wasn't worried. There was a funny moment when he asked what a "Hog Widget" is and why I needed to rent it.

SUNDAY-
In geekier news I spent a good bit of Sunday out of the cold enjoying the arcade. I spent hours playing Donkey Kong and Burgertime. In Donkey Kong I finally got to the 5th level. In Burgertime I got to the 5th or 6th screen. Burgertime is a very difficult game for those of you that don't know (Xbox generation, or just plain forgot).

SATURDAY-
I went to the annual 12th Night party held at Andrew and Caroline's house. The evening was started off by a stop to Cubanos for dinner. The Cuban food and drinks at this restaurant in Silver Spring are simply fantastic. The food and service are top notch and the bar tender knows how to pour a proper drink. No chain restaurant short-pour-glass-full-of-Cool-Aid at this place. Their mojitos are the best I've ever had, but I really haven't had that many, I should have more... If you happen to be near Silver Spring you should really check this place out. Yelp Reviews
Cubanos Restaurant site



After we left the restaurant we drove the 30 minutes to Caroline and Andrews. We got there a little early, before the table full of liquor, beers, and wines were opened. Andrew could get a job at Cubanos due to his heavy pouring hand. There was food here and there through the house with lots of choices. I saw the deviled eggs, and made a mental note to get some, but I must have gotten distracted. I enjoyed a strong cocktail called a Tipperary containing chartreuse (like the color). Make sure you get at least one ice cube in the glass, more if you have the option. I only had one Tipperary before switching to "lighter" drinks for the rest of the evening. I should mention that I was not driving during the evening of many drinks. Anyhow, the party was a good time as expected. It got crowded, met a few cool people, good conversation, and most surprisingly there was no football or sports talk of any kind. I didn't even see people fooling with their phones. I must have been in an alternate universe. I love their parties.

Your Chance to Win!

I went to Taco Bell for lunch on Friday (no fries). The girl at the register went into this rehearsed speech stating to please fill our the survey fora chance to win... Yeah, yeah the latest trend in marketing - the brief online survey. It seems like this trend went viral all at once. The bank receipt I was given at the drive through measures 10". The first 3.5" are my deposit information, and the rest is blank space and they "fill out our brief survey for your chance to win!" Really M&T bank? You are supposed to be professional, not a fast food or mall vendor. I'm sick of it, and have been for a while now. What irks me the most is the receipts that are a minimum of double their needed size because of all this foolishness. It bothers me because I need to process all business receipts which now entails an additional step. When I get the stack of business receipts for fuel, Home Depot, Lowes, and anywhere that uses thermal paper receipts I have to rip off the unneeded portion before scanning and filing of the documents. Otherwise, I would opt to not have the receipts and the bogus surveys, but I need to have accounting documents for everything.

On a brighter non-rant note the 12th Night party is tonight, and I'm really looking forward to it. Fancy drinks, and I'd say the crowd and music are the exact opposite of the 98 Rock crowd, if that makes sense. That's all for now.

Not much to report today come to think of it. Usually when I start typing I have something in mind, but today I really don't. It's like Seinfeld, a show about nothing. However I did get all of the tax filings finished today. I called the assigned auditor and made the audit appointment for next Monday at 9:30. I told the auditor that tomorrow worked for me, but Monday is the earliest available date. I'm ready to get this wild goose chase over with and expect another notice of audit in two years.

After work we went out for high priced beer night at Victoria in Columbia. The food at Victoria is always tasty, and the beer selection is always vast (but, quite expensive). We went because the wife likes the Belgium beers and it is Belgium beer week at Victoria and I can always find something non-Belgium to get me through. We ordered food and I was particular to order German potato salad as my side, not fries. When the food came to the table it was fries, but I reported the error and my potato salad was dropped off minutes later. However, the fries don't go back, they just sit there to remind you that you said you weren't eating fries for the month of January. Luckily we bumped into a friend and she ate some of the fries after being encouraged to do so. So far not eating fries or drinking soda has worked out, but it's the 5th of January so it's really not much of an accomplishment, just a start.

There is a 12th night party this Saturday that I'm attending, I look forward to it because not much happens in January, and I like Caroline, Andrew, Chris, and the crowd that comes to their parties. Alright, more later.

Budget shortfall

The day started out nicely when I made the choice to ride my motorcycle this morning because the phone said the temperature was 20º. When I got outside and all hooked up I thought, it's not that cold out here today. It was cold enough to have a constant battle with the helmet face shield fogging up. If I opened the front vent it was a blast of freezing air, closed the fogging bordered on dangerous. When I got up to highway speed things cleared up a bit. I noticed the outside temp at a local machine shop with a fancy LED sign read 25º, that was more like it.

In the mail today I received a Maryland Tax Audit notification. This isn't the first time I have been audited by the MD tax authority so I wasn't startled or any other emotion that is generally associated with a business tax audit. The form letter says that I need to contact the listed auditor by January 12th to arrange a mutually acceptable date and location for the audit to be conducted.

Some details in the letter struck me as odd - "...the State conducts audits of several thousand employers each year." SEVERAL THOUSAND!? Really, as in more than 3,000 audits per year? Your auditors must really be efficient, or you actually mean to say that you audit a few thousand employers and we singled out your company because we have audited you in the past and walked away at a net loss. We figured we'd double down to see if we can catch you slipping up on any of the tax payments these past two years.

"...to ensure employers' compliance with Maryland's Unemployment Insurance Law..." this one is most likely accurate and true. The unwritten theme is that governments are having budget shortfalls and we have found spending more on audits is worth the investment because sometimes we hit pay dirt.

Speaking of taxes and audits, I was working on the Federal W2 and W3 filing when I got the mail with the news. I've been working the last two days getting the end of year tax filings completed. For the employees out there that don't deal with taxes but once a year, consider yourself lucky, it's time consuming and sometimes difficult. I should be finished up the end of year tax forms and deposits by the end of the day on Wednesday. I finished the W2's by the end of work today, which is always a good feeling because I've noticed a lot of vendors over the years that had a difficult time of meeting a January 31st deadline, year after year. It helps that I'm not running a Fortune 500 company, but it still makes me feel good.

The last tax audit I went through was a MD Sales Tax audit that lasted a day and a half. Since I knew nothing of the audit process I was sweating bullets for two weeks, before getting to the table realizing that I was not who they were looking for at all. I was 99.5% compliant and they spent more money auditing me than they walked away with. It was a valuable learning tool that has prepared me for this next round. I'm not loosing any sleep over an audit this time, I have a vacation coming up anyhow.

Ric Ocasek and Gary Numan

The first call of the day was from an employee letting me know that he witnessed a horrific accident on the way to work. The accident is on the main route to work, so he was giving me a heads up to take an alternate route to the office to avoid the backup. He then went on to tell me the details of an MTA bus hitting a Chevy Cavalier and car parts flying from the roadway hitting his vehicle. Yes, he was that close. He pulled over at the scene and was the first to call 911. He said the dispatcher asked the nature of the accident and if police, fire, or ambulance needed to respond - his answer "yes, all of them". When you think about it a public transportation bus can put a real hurtin' on a economy car. My first thought after hanging up the phone was that I should ride my motorcycle to work today. Then I opted for my car because I had a big yellow recycling can that had to make it to the warehouse.

This evening I found out that a close friend's BMW M3 was traded in for something new. When I think about other peoples car history it's always the same thing - I had MY Subaru when they bought that car NEW, and now they have another new car. Sometimes it's two new cars in the time span (Billie Jo). I do have a motorcycle which most people don't, so my cars use in 2010 was like that of a senior citizen.

I often talk about my Subaru because of it's age and mainly because it's never let me down. It's a 1996 Impreza wagon Outback. It's the smaller Outback, 4-cylinder automatic, really nothing fancy. I was happy when I bought it because it had air conditioning AND power windows. Over the cars life thus far I have replaced the battery, starter, tires, oil filters, and air filters, and timing belts. That is it over all these years.

The 1996 Subaru has 188,887 on the odometer tonight. I hope to see 200,000 before I have to let it go, it will be a sad day, but that day isn't here yet.

Low Resolution

I never make new year resolutions because they are never kept. The cold turkey method of changing a behavior generally doesn't work, so why bother? I'm not talking about smoking, I'm referring to any unhealthy behavior - fast food, junk food, caffeine, reality TV shows, alcohol, whatever is fun and therefore bad for you. Baby steps, that is the sure fire way to feel good about yourself, and have something to talk about.

I came up with the bright idea yesterday to try, try again to kick the love for fast food but in an attainable way. For the month of January I'm going to *try* to skip french fries and soda. This is perhaps possible because there are substitutes for both items that are generally available. If I can get through the month of January on the wagon then I'll have a building block for something more substantial.

Yesterday there was a plan to go to the new gym by my work and at the last second it was skipped. Pulled out of the exit at the last second when we saw only one car in the gym lot. So there was brunch, motorcycle ride to the bank, bar food (no fries*), drinks, hot tub, then drive home. On Monday the party is over and it's back to the grind, but January is a clam month so it's more like grind lite.

Do people make new years resolutions any more? Did you?

Engineer a new year

I'm starting the year out with a brunch at the Engineers Club in Baltimore. A private club that I get invited to from time to time by my friend and cousin Jason and his wife. I have said for a long time that country club memberships, or in this case a city club membership is worth every dollar spent. I'm not a fan of kids generally, but when kids and restaurants are combined everyone looses. The beauty of country clubs (from my limited experience) is the absence of noisy ill-behaved kids. No disruptions in the bar area because it's before 8pm, or any other "family friendly" policy designed to net the most dollars overall. So, this morning I'm going to be at the peaceful place known as the Engineers Club, ahhh.

But it doesn't end there! My wife is a fitness instructor and has a meeting scheduled for her main club today. So, I was told this morning, "pack a workout bag". Really, I'm going to be in a gym on January 1st with all the others that fell off the wagon. Guess so. The bag is packed and the iPod charged, I'm ready to get this over with. I just hope she coworkers don't give her flack for bringing me around. Personally I think it's Bad Idea Jeans.

This evening is scheduled at a wine bar somewhere near Towson followed by a hot tub. Wine bars generally aren't my thing because I like beer and liquor when the beer runs out. Hopefully there will be a limited beer selection available, else I will venture into the Riesling offerings trying to find a ten dollar bottle like they have at the store. Come to think of it a wine bar is like a country club because it's expensive and free of kids. Cheers.